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Since i quit i hav many items i no longer need for the one that can come up with the best joke will get my reindeer costume 7 sets of signs dragon catcher so make me laugh and u can win these items ! :yahoo: hurry its free so take couple seconds to make me laugh  >:D

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Since i quit i hav many items i no longer need for the one that can come up with the best joke will get my reindeer costume 7 sets of signs dragon catcher so make me laugh and u can win these items ! :yahoo: hurry its free so take couple seconds to make me laugh  >:D


Lemme come up with a few. Here's the first one.


Boy: This is bad!

Cute woman: what is it?

Boy: hurry up! :pleasantry:

Cute woman: hurry up and do what?

Lucky Boy mode: my pénís Stopped breathing! Give it CPR quick!

Woman: ok


Second joke

Girl: hey

Boy: hi

Girl: what you up too?

Boy: nuthing

Girl: can I ask who do you love?

Boy: I'm talking to her now.

Girl: OMG!!!!!! I love you tooooooo  :blush:

Boy: no. I mean I'm talking to her on Facebook......





Boy: akward ... :crazy:




(By: Godsrange / Dragonskey #1 arena Elf side us-saphire 8) ) thank you for listening to my lame jokes. :friends:

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This could really help me out if youre serious. Trying to get.my elf back up and all.


Heres my joke

Its probably on the internet somewhere and probably different,  but i heard it a long time ago and this is what i remember of it.


The king was looking for a man to marry his daughter. So he found 3 men, a white man, a black man, and a chinese man.He told each of these men, the one who is able to make my daughter during sex, will marry her


The white man goes in first, thinking that with passion and kindness he will win her heart and bring a tear into her eyes.


Once he comes out, he wasnt able to make her shed a tear. The king dismisses the man and the black man was next.


The black man goes in thinking that with tough love and a little aggression he would make her cry. After trying everything he comes out without the princess  shedding a single tear.

The chinese man is the last one left, he puffs up his chest and walks into the room.


A couple of minutes later the king hears his daughter crying. The chinese man walks out with a big smile on his face.


The king asks him "how did you do it" as he was very surprised.


The chinese man smiled and replied

"me chinese, me play trick, me put chili on my dikk"


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Warning! K-16 content  ;D





A naked man was looking at himself in a mirror and says to his wife

: here you see 100kg of pure dynamite - man

: isn't it dangerious when theres so short fuse? - wife




What a nerd does when he sees a beautiful woman?

- saves the photo



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Can i get some items? :friends: this is a joking

1:Hi my freind


1:WTH u change ur hair like a barbie

2:Thank u so much i didnt like u u chance ur idiotics thing like spongebob and patrick

1:fvck u my freind

2:ok no problem


no longer  Player 2 dead coz  the Player 1 make he laughs and cant take a breath


hope u like it :blush:

Second joking: Justin bieber : baby baby baby ohh

                            A baby            : dont sing again ♥♥♥♥♥ ur voice is like trash

                            Justin biber  : Pay me 8) and i will do that

                          Baby mom    : this is ur gift JB a poop from a baby

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When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to 300°C.


The Russians used a pencil.

Still laughing on the floor :D

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For signs and reindeer costume....lol


A 6 year old boy asked to her teacher " Mam, can i become father in this age??"

teacher - "No way...!" :lol:

the boy then turned towards the girl sitting side by him and spoke - "See, i told u! There nothing to worry about last night!" :rofl:



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:facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm:

im not spamming

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:facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm:

im not spamming


y u spamin
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:facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm:

im not spamming


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If your reading this it means I wasted a few seconds of your life that you will never get back

Oh troll on me of you like . I'll just make sure to put a mirror in front of you

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Well bro u didnt say How to make you laught so....here it comes : ;D  Put in youtube  : FUNnNiest thing in the world a must see , ig f  you will laught a lot believe me hahaha send me the reward  :lol: :good: :yahoo:  ........Panembra , ilpam.......ilpanemll  8)


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Two zebras are talking and one asks the other, "Am I black with white stripes or white with black stripes?" The other replies, "Well I don't know. You should pray to God about that and ask him." So that night he did and God replied, "You are what you are." The next day he said to the other zebra, "I still don't understand what I am because God just said, You are what you are." The second zebra responds, "You must be white with blacks stripes or else God would have said, Yo is what yo is."
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1 - A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen."


The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me." The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."


2- A young blonde fears her husband is having an affair. She goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she finds him in bed with a redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps off the bed and starts begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself. Hysterically, the blonde responds to the husband: "Shut up, you're next."


3-I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts". Well, YES. That's what I bought them for. You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out.


4- This isn't a joke, this is a funny video, unfortunately this is in portuguese, but it don't need comentarys(they are useless), just need to watch and laugh :D

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A lawyer, an economist, and a teacher were going to the bathroom. The lawyer  gets done, washes his hands, and then proceeds to use almost the entire roll of  paper towels to dry his hands. He says "I was taught to be thorough." The  economist gets done, washes his hands, but uses only one paper towel. He says "I  was taught to be environmentally friendly." The teacher gets done and leaves without washing his hands. He says "I was taught not to piss on my hands." Not a bad one :unknw:



Man: "God, why you make woman so beautiful?"

God: "So you would love  her."

Man: "But God, why you make her so dumb?"

God: "So she would love  you!"


Why do men  masturbate?

It's sex with  someone they love.A couple went on vacation to  a resort up north. The husband liked to fish, and the wife liked to read. One  morning the husband came back from fishing after getting up really early that  morning and took a nap. While he slept, the wife decided to take the boat out.

She was not familiar with the lake, so she rowed out and anchored the boat,  and started reading her book. Along comes the Game Warden in his boat, pulls up  alongside the woman's boat and asks her what she's doing?

She says, "Reading  my book." The Game Warden tells her she is in a restricted fishing area and she  explains that she's not fishing.

To which he replied, "But you have all this  equipment. I will have to take you in and write you up!"

Angry that the  warden was being so unreasonable, the lady told the warden, "If you do that, I will charge you with rape." The warden, shocked by her statement, replied,  "But I didn't even touch you."

To which the lady replied, "Yeah, but you  have all the equipment!"Some i made and my friends said :unknw: (Maybe ill win u never know!) :lol:

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first joke:



so this guy says to his girlfriend: "come to my place tonight, the house is empty "

so the girls comes over to his place and the house really is empty...



second joke:



a little girl walks in on her mom taking a shower and she asks her mom whats that on her chest so her mom says those are tits and the kid asks her when will she get those and her mom replies with when u grow up. Then the girl asks her whats that between her legs and her mom says a vagina the kid asks her mom when will she get that and her mom say when she grows up. So now 15 min later the kid walks in on her dad taking a shower and she asks her dad whats that between his legs and dad says a dick so she asks him when will she get that and he says "when your mom goes to work :spiteful: "



third joke:

(this one is a bit racist)

whats a black guy doing with an empty sheet of paper in his hands?

reading his rights.



fourth joke:



a blond chick went fishing on a river and the guard comes and says "excuse me miss but u need a permit to fish her" and she replies "ohhh god damn it i was using worms this entire time"



fifth joke:



how many cops does it take to change a light bulb?

none... they just beat the room up for being black



sixth joke:



so little Jack is supposed to have sex with little Jane after school but he didnt know how to do it so he quickly ran home after school and explaned his father the entire situation and asked him for help, so his father gave him a walkie talkie and told him that he will guide him trough it once he's there. So little Jack went to meet little Jane near the school and they were ready to begin. Jack didnt know what do to se he secretly asks his dad via the walkie talkie what to do and his father tells him to start kissing her so thats what he does, now his father tells him to start taking her clothes of so thats what he does and now his dad tells him all proud "now my son stick that thing u and me got in her"

and he sticks a walkie talkie up her pussy....



seventh joke:

why did Hitler kill himself?

his gas bill came





those are all i could think of right now, i know they're a bit sexist or racist but those are jokes and i hope no one gets offended by them.

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If you don't know who vote in next elections, vote in penis! He is the only that:

- The only who increase population.

- It's hard.

- Respect rules.

- Don't like thin.

- Has the support of the most beautiful women in the world.

- His concern is to stay inside.

- His achievements appear after nine months.

- Is modest, is always hidden.

- On the street walking upside down.

- Works at any time of day or night.

- Is not lazy, just raises the thought.

- Do not like advertising, does not appear in the newspapers.

- Is poor, lives hanging.

- Cries of pleasure when it works.

- It's honest, it's the only one that goes out full and return empty.

- Is always to the left, though not a Communist.

- Sportsman, play with two balls.

- Does headed goal and even spits in the face of the goalkeeper.

- ONLY gets lazy after work.

- It is poor and simple, sleeps on top of the bag.

- It is polite, when he sees women it rises.

- Don't like who pull his bag.

- It is not tricky, but sometimes attacks from behind.

So... Vote in penis!!!

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